Sunday, October 28, 2007


Last night was the ever-famous Springfield Halloween Pub Crawl. Thousands of people come down for this thing, pay 15$, and get into all the bars downtown for free. Basically though they stand in line freezing their butts off. For the last four years Jeff and I have dressed up in costume and passed out cookies to the drunk college folk standing in lines... this year however, we did not. Well, we sort of did... This weekend was the first Skinny Improv Improv festival so Jeff had shows all last night and his costume wasn't ready... I won't spoil what it is b/c he's going to wear it this afternoon, but seriously, its funny.

So, instead of our usual shenanigans, Jeff went around doing man-on-the-street interviews. Nate Black, cameraman extraordinarie, went along, as well as Dan Clair, Jeff's co-host on the Mystery Hour. I tagged along to get in some good laughs. I can't tell you how insane these people are for this pub crawl. Its like Mardi-Gras down there. Most of the girls are dressed as slutty-something or others. Slutty Nurse, Slutty Cowgirl, Slutty Maid, Slutty Bunny, Playboy Bunny, Slutty Bee, Slutty Bar-Maid, Slutty Grecian woman, Slutty Cop, Slutty Prisoner, and Slutty Referee. Its sorta disgusting, b/c by the end of the night you see butt-cracks, tongs, and nipples b/c the girls are too drunk to hold it together. My favorite was the girl being interviewed who I told had her breast showing and on camera she said, "Its all good," while her less intoxicated friend held her bunny bustier up to cover her nipple. Hmmmm, she could be tied, however, with the Slutty Indian who on camera acted as if she was giving my husband a blow job while she was showing the camera her flesh-colored underwear. Lets just say its a good thing that I have a sense of humor and am pretty un-embarrassed, most wives would have thrown a conniption fit.

The other crazy point of the evening was running into yellow-helmet insane old man who walked up to Dan and I starting a conversation about how crazy all these people are and just couldn't let it go. Seizing the opportunity to talk to a true character, Jeff asked the guy to be interviewed. He started rambling on about the different instruments he plays, highlighting the fact that he is the best guitar player in the US, and that he especially likes to play the concertina (if you don't know what that is you should look it up--my uncle has one and breaks it out for special holidays to make my mom laugh). I started mentioning to Dan that this man is probably crazy, but Dan just thought he was drunk. Oh-no, my intuition proved to be right. At the end of his 10-minute ramblings the man stated "You don't care about music. No one here cares about their music. These college kids don't care about their music." We all thought the guy was going to haul off and punch Jeff by the end of it, so we quickly scurried back to the Skinny. Its gonna make for some good Mystery Hour footage, though.

All in all, every year I get done with the pub crawl wanting to wipe the sleaze and debauchery out of my head that I have witnessed. Jeff just likes to witness drunken-Hallow-Craziness and characters dressed up as, well, characters.

One of my favorite costume ideas from the evening came from a conversation with Nichole Chilton, who gets just as sick of the slutty-something-or-others on Halloween. She told me she wants to dress up next year as a "Slutty Puritan," who shows only her wrists. Me Likey.


Sky Girl said...

When I look at Halloween costumes, I feel old, because I think they all look so sleazy. Then I start to worry that maybe my prudishness on the issue is a sign of old age. I'm glad I skipped the Pub Crawl.

Winnie said...


Baby Fat Jones said...

i like that you used the term 'conniption fit'.

and for the record, that girl wasn't pretending to give jeff a blow job--it just looked like it from the angle you were standing at. and it feels weird to have typed the words 'blow job'.

Nicole said...

I don't know...I was standing behind him, and I saw some major face nuzzling in the crotch area...

It was good to run into you on Saturday! We may have to plan some modest costumes for next year!

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