Opinions, Shmo-pinions

So I guess I am a rather opinionated person. I knew that... I mean, I know that. Jeff DEFINITELY knows that... but this whole grad school at Evangel thing I think is going to pull me to revisit some of those opinions rather quickly.

So I'm in this class called Integration of Christianity and Counseling. The whole point it to get us to think about our faith and how we should be incorporating it into everything we do... I'm good with that concept. I want to do a better job in my life of putting God above myself, more of Him, less of me, etc.

But why does that have to be so HARD?

I mean, I started reading the books for this class and each of them right off the bat I disagreed with. I disagree with a lot of Christian "fluff" (as I like to call it) because its just too fluffy. I hate sayings like "being saved," and the idea that someone's life can be filled with the Holy Spirit and they were never the same after that. It just makes it sound like there is an audible voice that other, better, Christians are hearing that I'm not.

From what I've experienced and what I have heard from other very close-walking (Oh no--Chrsitaneese fluff words, i am such a hypocrite) people is that it never turns out to be a sudden change in you once you come to trust God more or have the Holy Spirit talk to you or whatever. Its a WALK. Its a path. Its not automatic. I mean, i feel like I need to be "saved" every day. Some days I am, other days I am drowning.

Anyway, all of this is to say that I get all ruffled up when I feel like others are putting God into these easy to understand yet so hard to follow pigeon holes--as if we're all loosers for not "getting it." Its not that they're SAYING that, its that I feel that--with all my insecurities and weaknesses.

Of course you know its more about my weaknesses than that of others. Its more about how I see things than how they do that "ruffles" me.